How does Holden reject becoming part of society and adulthood in The Catcher in the Rye?

The way that Holden rejects becoming part of society and
adulthood is by creating a set of personal rules, axioms, and ideals that represent his
resentment against both. These ideals and rules are also ways for Holden to protect
himself from possible loss and/or rejection of his
peers.

What Holden resents the most is that he cannot find
his place in an ever-changing society. He cannot find his place within his own growing
process, either. He feels that he is basically falling behind with both. By making his
own rules, and ideas, Holden can choose who is "good" and who is "bad". In his case,
anyone who does not abide by what he considers to be "real" is immediately labeled as a
"phony". Hence, out of that rule that he made for himself, he can now classify his
brother, some peers, and some other adults as "phony" as well. Moreover, he can also
choose not to mingle with them and use their phoniness (and not his anti-social
tendencies) as an excuse for not communicating.

He also
makes the exception that children are to be respected, loved, and always protected. This
is what gives him the idea of wanting to be a catcher in the rye that would protect the
kids that may fall over. This specific life rule Holden makes in honor of his younger
brother, Allie, who died of leukemia. His death turned Holden's life upside down. By
projecting his love for Allie onto a wish for protecting children, Holden has the
opportunity to grief.

Moreover, Holden also makes a rule to
only be kind and speak respectfully to his younger sister. To him, she is the only
female worth treating nicely. Since he is unable to connect with his peers, he finds
protection and attention in a younger child. This is another way in which Holden tries
to find a role to fulfill under the protection of his own little
rules.

Therefore, Holden cocoons himself inside his own
world of beliefs and assumptions by distancing himself from a changing society, and by
abiding by rules that he makes for himself in lieu of facing his inner fear of
rejection.